I needed to remember Sept. 11

  • Published
  • By Maj. Dani Johnson
  • 18th Wing Public Affairs
KADENA AIR BASE, Japan (AFPN) --  I wanted to remember. I needed to remember.

I recently went and saw the movie "World Trade Center." I mentioned to some co-workers I was going to see the movie and the overwhelming response was "Why?" and "I don't want to relive it."

I thought long and hard about going to see the movie, knowing it was going to dredge up the emotions from that time. I realized I needed to reaffirm my commitment to ensuring we live in a safe world. The movie reminded me of why we serve. It also brought back the memories of that time.

Sept. 11, 2001, is a day when almost everyone can tell you what they were doing when they heard about the World Trade Center and the Pentagon being hit, as well as the plane crashing into the Pennsylvania field. I was at work at Headquarters U.S. Air Forces in Europe Public Affairs at Ramstein Air Base, Germany. We normally didn't keep the television on in our division but another division chief did. Maj. (now Lt. Col.) Manning Brown came in and told us we needed to turn our TV on. We turned it on just seconds before the second aircraft hit the towers.

We watched in detached horror. It was surreal. It couldn't be happening to our country. We are invincible. Almost immediately, we realized we were going to war and those of us in Europe were going to be actively involved.

We started gathering all the information we could. It was approximately 3 p.m. in Germany when we first heard; none of us left the office until after 10 p.m. that night. Like almost everyone, we went into 24-hour shifts preparing for the worst.

A few weeks later I was napping on my office floor waiting for the phone call (it came in at about 3 a.m.) telling us the C-17 Globemaster IIIs had cleared the air space over Afghanistan. We could now call the media outlets and tell them the time of the press conference when that first C-17 landed at Ramstein after dropping humanitarian aid to the Afghan people. We couldn't announce it before this because of the safety and security of our aircraft and people.

That was big, but it wasn't my life-changing moment. That happened Dec. 6, 2001, when I covered the first fallen Soldier ceremony at Ramstein. It was late evening. It was the first night the temperatures had gone below freezing. We had media cordoned in an area and honor guard teams from the Army and Navy were practicing their maneuvers.

It seemed like the whole base went silent when we heard the C-141 Starlifter arriving. We all went to our assigned areas and waited. We saluted as the aircraft taxied to its parking slot. It was cold. I had forgotten my gloves, but that didn't matter: it was time to honor our brothers. We stood at attention for more than 45 minutes. Our feet were frozen, our backs were tightening from not being able to relax -- it didn't matter. We had to honor our brothers.

As the first casket was carried off, I could not help myself -- tears started running down my face and didn't stop until the ceremony was over. These men who gave their all were my brothers. They had families and friends who loved them and didn't get to say goodbye. Afterward I just wanted to call my family and tell them I loved them.

The next day we brought in the wounded Soldiers. Once again we had media cordoned in an area to view. I walked out to the aircraft and saw one Soldier being carried off the aircraft to the waiting bus and I thought to myself, "Why are we bringing Afghan soldiers in?" Then it hit me how good our special operations Soldiers are; at first glance I couldn't tell the difference with the heavy beard. The second thing that hit me was seeing one of my fellow public affairs Airmen carrying a Soldier off the aircraft. He was there to escort media, but more help was needed with the Soldiers and he didn't think twice. We all helped load bags.

These events made me fully understand why I serve my country and why I'm willing to give my all in that service. In the five years since we began the war on terrorism, many of us have deployed and had a direct impact on the fight. However, with our day-to-day operations, it's easy to push to the backs of our minds why we are at war.

With the constant media attention and political questioning of the purpose and reasons as to why we are at war, I needed to reaffirm why we are doing what we are doing -- that is why I went to the movie.

I needed to remember.