Common courtesy plummets in summer heat?

  • Published
  • By Senior Airman Julie Weckerlein
  • 31st Fighter Wing Public Affairs
AVIANO AIR BASE, Italy (AFPN) --  I bet it is a scientific fact: When the temperature rises, common courtesy drops. There should be a name for it, like “heat madness.”

I recently got a rude awakening about this phenomenon. I was disrespected by someone. Outwardly, I shrugged off the incident, but inside, I was hurt by it. So, like spilled soda on a hot afternoon, the negativity stuck to me. I found myself focusing on other people’s rudeness and became a little cynical myself.

I reeled with anger when I heard someone here call an American Forces Network disc jockey a moron, and say, “I hate you. Get off the radio. If I were you, I would stab myself with a fork.”

I felt sick to my stomach when I saw a woman belittle a food court worker because the worker mistakenly gave the woman ketchup instead of barbecue sauce.

I felt disgusted when my husband told me of a thrift shop customer who chastised a volunteer who wouldn’t unlawfully bend the rules for her.

I wanted to scream with frustration when a manager from our base newspaper's publisher called to ask if there was anything I could do to stop Aviano people from threatening her workers when their ads didn’t run in the paper. Never mind that the publisher makes it clear those free ads run on a space-available basis only.

And what really bothered me was that it seemed people were being most cruel to those they viewed as “inferior”: faceless lower-ranking airmen; food workers; full-time volunteers; Italian workers.

I wondered, is it the heat? Does excessive sunlight feed people’s inner demons? In the spring, the base newspaper's inbox received about ten compliments a week; now, I was lucky to find two. Was it that nobody was doing anything nice around here, or was it that nobody was noticing?

I pondered this the other day as I walked into my office, barely noticing the cleaning lady walk past me. I see her every day, but I don’t know her name. Her English is limited; my Italian is virtually non-existent. She cleans up the bathrooms, mops the floors and empties trash. Not a fun job, I’m sure. People walk over her freshly mopped floors and leave pools of water and trash on the bathroom counters every day. But, she does her job thoroughly and with a smile. She has a friendly greeting for everyone.

This particular morning was no exception.

“Ciao,” she said to me. I returned the greeting. She pointed to my belly and asked, “Bambino?” I realized she was asking about my pregnancy, so I answered (with the little Italian I do know) that things were good. She gave me a knowing smile and nodded her head, and we went our separate ways.

Not surprisingly, though, a smile had made its way on my face, too. And as the day continued, a weird thing happened. I zeroed in on the “flip” side.

I felt good when I saw an officer give up his booth seat so an enlisted mother could feed her three children comfortably in the crowded food court. I was pleased that the gate guards had genuine, friendly greetings for every driver coming on-base, despite a day spent standing in the heat in full gear.

I was amazed when I overheard a woman profusely thank a customer service representative for her help, even though the customer service rep wasn’t able to locate the woman's order. The customer, though, appreciated the effort.

I even felt myself willing to stay late to help a co-worker create a going-away gift.

The cleaning lady did more than just say hello to me. Her simple gesture of kindness took my negative attitude and twisted it into the opposite direction to the point that I wanted to be a nicer person too. It wasn’t about rank or status, job or environment. It was about one human reaching out and being kind to another.

There are still rude people out there. I still have the feeling that the heat can bring out the worst in people. But I think we can all beat the heat madness one courteous act at a time.